Friday, February 19, 2010
really quiet cny this year. and so far i'm really liking it. i hate big gatherings. its really pointless when i'm not really interested in seeing my extended family (majority of whom don't even contact us except in social functions which we are thrown together) so yeah.
cousin flew off to melbs on sunday night. suddenly am not looking forward to studying overseas. i have this love/hate relationship with fresh starts. i crave for it yet i dread the moment it actually arrives. not to mention it puts a bajillion miles between me and my besties and bf.
promised myself i would get my driving license by the end of 2010 but the way i keep procrastinating on it means it might take a while longer.
i swear the gushy, annoyingly optimistic side of me is overflowing. i actually spent two days making cupcakes and chocolates for my friends and bf. (mostly bf but i saved the nicer ones for friends, bf can have the not-so-nice looking ones. hee.) the one thing i promised myself was never to get domesticated. ugh. (i swore that my future husband was gonna cook, clean and do whatever but give birth to our future spawnlings [i say, spawnlings sounds so much awesome-r than babies] and even then i'll begrudge him for it since i got fat and moody for the spawnling to pop out.) omgggg. i sound like a total bitch. okay. change of plans. scrap what i said. i'll plan this thing out after marriage so the poor sucker can't do anything. muahaha. xD
cousin flew off to melbs on sunday night. suddenly am not looking forward to studying overseas. i have this love/hate relationship with fresh starts. i crave for it yet i dread the moment it actually arrives. not to mention it puts a bajillion miles between me and my besties and bf.
promised myself i would get my driving license by the end of 2010 but the way i keep procrastinating on it means it might take a while longer.
i swear the gushy, annoyingly optimistic side of me is overflowing. i actually spent two days making cupcakes and chocolates for my friends and bf. (mostly bf but i saved the nicer ones for friends, bf can have the not-so-nice looking ones. hee.) the one thing i promised myself was never to get domesticated. ugh. (i swore that my future husband was gonna cook, clean and do whatever but give birth to our future spawnlings [i say, spawnlings sounds so much awesome-r than babies] and even then i'll begrudge him for it since i got fat and moody for the spawnling to pop out.) omgggg. i sound like a total bitch. okay. change of plans. scrap what i said. i'll plan this thing out after marriage so the poor sucker can't do anything. muahaha. xD
what we could have been, 11:29 am.
Sunday, February 14, 2010
i feel like someone slapped me in the face and poured salt in a raw wound. seriously seriously upset. i sound like a bitch right now but i'm practically containing myself from picking up the phone and screaming 'fuck you' to that person. UGH.
shoulda known it was too good to be true. sighs. i swear, 3 years on from the first disaster to now and NO improvement. grrrr. subtle hints don't work, 'subtle' hints (which means practically waylaying it) also don't work. wth.
note to self: listening to music that makes me cry actually makes the situation even more bleak but i think my mind's punishing my heart. :(
maybe i wasn't meant to love.
shoulda known it was too good to be true. sighs. i swear, 3 years on from the first disaster to now and NO improvement. grrrr. subtle hints don't work, 'subtle' hints (which means practically waylaying it) also don't work. wth.
note to self: listening to music that makes me cry actually makes the situation even more bleak but i think my mind's punishing my heart. :(
maybe i wasn't meant to love.
what we could have been, 10:21 pm.
Thursday, February 11, 2010
its funny how naysayers always say valentine's day is so commercialized. but what if i want to be bought into this fairytale? agreeably, its the one day where its not okay to be single (not that its a must to be attached)
i get all gooey inside whenever i see couples or flowers or hear love songs on the radio during the week leading up to v-day. *sighs*
its like a happiness drug. one that i walk around with rose-colored spectacles and view the world in the same shade. its such a happy time (and yes, i'm blathering but obviously v-day is like cocaine to me)
Can you feel this magic in the air?
It must've been the way you kissed me
Fell in love when I saw you standin' there
It must've been the way
-taylor swift
i get all gooey inside whenever i see couples or flowers or hear love songs on the radio during the week leading up to v-day. *sighs*
its like a happiness drug. one that i walk around with rose-colored spectacles and view the world in the same shade. its such a happy time (and yes, i'm blathering but obviously v-day is like cocaine to me)
Can you feel this magic in the air?
It must've been the way you kissed me
Fell in love when I saw you standin' there
It must've been the way
-taylor swift
what we could have been, 9:16 am.
Tuesday, February 09, 2010
movie premier/preview of Valentine's Day tonight. aaaah! i swear i'm just gonna ogle and drool over my hawt hawt husband no 2. hahaha.
meeting kat for din dins before that. hopefully she won't be wearing heels if not i'll regret not wearing heels too.
meeting kat for din dins before that. hopefully she won't be wearing heels if not i'll regret not wearing heels too.
what we could have been, 11:40 am.
Thursday, February 04, 2010
my nails are the sex! i could just orgasm looking at them can? *sighs* they're so worth the money and pampering. CNY, i am sooooo prepared for you. wish i could take a photo but i cant hold the cam and take my nails. hopefully i can get Kev to do it tml.
what we could have been, 11:35 pm.
Wednesday, February 03, 2010
went to the Y cafe today. and i've never missed being us this much before.
there's onions on my plate. the ones you would normally eat coz i said its weird and makes your breath smelly but you like them and eat them anyway. i miss how you would laugh at how i hold my chopsticks and ask if i needed a fork despite that i'll never say yes and that you'd never ask for it even if i did. i miss how you'd listen to me chatter just so you can steal a sip of my drink.
goddammit. i miss you. :(
there's onions on my plate. the ones you would normally eat coz i said its weird and makes your breath smelly but you like them and eat them anyway. i miss how you would laugh at how i hold my chopsticks and ask if i needed a fork despite that i'll never say yes and that you'd never ask for it even if i did. i miss how you'd listen to me chatter just so you can steal a sip of my drink.
goddammit. i miss you. :(
what we could have been, 12:25 pm.
Monday, February 01, 2010
hard day at work. really tried to finish up as much as i could. course my attention span died when i realised its half hour til knockoff. hee.
sometimes i wonder if i made the right decision years ago but everytime i question it, you do something that makes me say 'yeah i made the right choice'. it does hurt at times, i admit. but if my 'friends' really did care, then i wouldn't have left in the first place too.
sometimes i wonder if i made the right decision years ago but everytime i question it, you do something that makes me say 'yeah i made the right choice'. it does hurt at times, i admit. but if my 'friends' really did care, then i wouldn't have left in the first place too.
what we could have been, 5:53 pm.
